I use to be there. I felt so unworthy of everything and completely based my worthiness on how much $ I had, what brands I wore, job title, people I knew, material reputation — all soulless physical constructs that stripped me away from my soul. These mentalities were engrained into me from childhood, that I am only deserving of praise and love if I had good grades or went to a good college or made a lot of $. I was always up in my ego trying to prove myself as a result, to gain approval and validation. When operating from a place of fear, lack and ego, things often backfire because of unconscious choices made from unalignment from your authentic self. I got into abusive relationships just to seek love that I never had as a child, I got screwed over many times in business just because I was chasing money to fill in the lack and void, worked at 9-5 jobs I hated because I didn’t think I deserved better just to “get by” and survive. I spent majority of my teenage years through early-mid 20s in depression and living in perpetual fear of not meeting the expectations of society.
My spirit suffered. I was lost and didn’t know who I really was. My mind was enslaved by my conditionings and attachment to false beliefs. I was unaware and a pawn to the illusion and rules of a fake society, my environment, friends, parents and the pressure just to “fit in” to a world I never felt like I belonged to in the first place.
And then a tragic event shook me awake and I started to become aware, and I started questioning. I started to dismantle everything I ever thought was true or believed about myself and life as I knew it. It was terrifying, to all of a sudden not know who you are and the crumbling of everything you knew, but at the same time liberating to realize you are free from everything that you are not. And when you are none of what you thought you were, it gets even deeper. Who am I truly? Without the labels, conditioning, stories and beliefs? The realization to this question of “Who Am I” was one of the factors that triggered my spiritual awakening so hard like a train hit me. I woke up and was never the same for the better after.
Have you ever wondered why you have to play by the rules of an artificially constructed system? What if it didn’t exist anymore, or if this system was different from the one you’ve been conditioned to play in from birth. Who would you be conditioned to be if it was different? Who would you be without the conditioning of this current system and beliefs instilled by all the collective experiences in your life so far? Who would you be without any system?
Do you see how infinite it is for us to choose how our realities can actually be?
I started questioning this, and realized how playing by the rules of a broken system was the cause of my suffering and confusion, and that none of it has to be this way. Nothing can create the rules for my life except myself. I choose how I want to experience my one time experience on this planet. When I tap into my inner empowerment of choice, I become sovereign and I don’t need to rely on a faulty and corrupt system to lead my life and make me feel secure. We are here to thrive on our own conditions, not to survive in order to be a part of an artificial construct of demands and illusions of how things should be.
I started to make my own rules. I started to choose how I wanted to experience my reality instead of being a puppet to my unconscious beliefs and programmings and society dogmas. I am in this system, but not of this system. I choose to experience everything in higher emotions and frequencies to shift into another reality of my desire, and see the magic in everything. And the magic is exactly what I started experiencing in my outer reality as well.
Reality is just what we make of it, created from the mind. Therefore, you can create any reality you want with your mind, it’s magical! It’s infinite.
“Your worthiness is inherent.
The system is flawed , not you.
Release the dying system from your neck.
There is a whole new world waiting for you to create it” – @emmazeck_
This is why when you connect to and realize your soul, you start to doubt a soulless system and detach from it. You won’t be able to trust anything that keeps you in fear and suffering. You question everything first to know all sides to make a more conscious and informed decision. You see through the fear tactics used for eons to divide and control us and hide the truth from us of who we really are. You can’t be manipulated anymore when you heal and trust yourself, and intuitively know when you are being lied to. That’s why when the “pandemic” hit, I couldn’t even be phased by it into a lower state of consciousness rooted in fear.
We are so much more than the illusions, lies and programmings we identify with in an artificial system.